What if you don’t have a “thing”?
If “finding your passion” feels overwhelming, this is for you. Here’s what to do instead.
I used to think there was something wrong with me because I didn’t have “a thing” like I saw so many other kids had.
👇 You know the type:
The kid who picked up a camera at age 5 and knew they’d be a photographer.
The one who always wanted to be a doctor and actually became one.
The one obsessed with hair who became a hairstylist.
Meanwhile, I wanted to be everything from a news anchor to President of the United States to a therapist-slash-writer-slash-coffee-shop-owner.
Eventually, I chose being a therapist. But even then, I realized I didn’t want to make being a therapist my entire personality. I felt less compared to all those mega-focused single-passion individuals who seemed entirely fulfilled by their one thing.
But here’s what I’ve come to believe, deep in my bones:
The idea that you need one soul-defining passion isn’t just unrealistic. It’s limiting. It makes us feel like we only get to be one thing.
But the truth? You get to be as many things as you want.
I’m not who I was ten years ago, and I love that.
I’m a therapist, an amateur home chef, an event planner, a content creator, and more.
What about you?
The pressure is real
We live in a world obsessed with purpose.
From TED Talks to Instagram quotes, we’re constantly told to “find our why” or “pursue our calling.”
And while that can be inspiring, it can also feel... heavy.
Because what happens when you don’t know what your passion is?
Or when the thing that used to light you up no longer fits?
That pressure often turns into shame.
You start thinking:
Am I behind?
Did I miss something?
Why does everyone else seem so certain while I’m dabbling?
But here’s the truth:
Most people don’t stumble on passion through a single “aha!” moment.
They follow what feels good. What feels right. And eventually, one of those things becomes a passion (not the passion).
It happens slowly. In pieces. Often by accident. And almost definitely not all at once.
Follow the glimmers, not the pressure
Instead of asking, “What’s my passion?” try:
What makes me curious?
What brings me joy?
Where do I feel in flow, like time disappears?
I call these glimmers.
It’s not a fireworks display. It’s more like a soft candlelight that beckons you forward.
A glimmer might be:
A new hobby you’re loving, just for now.
A conversation that lights you up.
A sudden urge to revisit something from childhood.
When you stop forcing a capital-P Passion to appear and follow what feels joyful instead, life becomes less about the destination and more about staying connected to what makes you feel alive.
What if passion isn’t a lightning bolt, but a slow burn?
We love the drama of the Big Epiphany.
The person who quits their job, moves to Italy, and writes a bestselling novel over croissants.
But for most of us? Passion arrives slowly.
It sneaks in through exploration, gut feelings, and nudges.
It builds as we stay close to what feels meaningful—or simply joyful (no productivity necessary).
You start realizing:
That hobby you kept dismissing?
That volunteer gig that gave you butterflies?
That moment of “I could do this forever”?
Those moments matter.
They’re pointing you toward something real—more real than any pressure-filled version of passion you were told to chase.
Meaning can be a moving target
It’s okay if your passions change.
It’s okay if you’re still figuring it out.
It’s okay if the thing that used to define you no longer fits.
You’re allowed to grow out of old dreams.
You’re allowed to try on new ones.
You’re allowed to evolve.
I’ve worked with hundreds of people who thought they needed the “perfect” path to be happy.
Almost all of them found the same truth:
The moments that bring us peace and joy aren’t the ones where we acquire the most material success, status, or approval.
They are the moments we feel present, connected, and embrace who we really are.
💡 Try this instead of “what’s my purpose?”
If you’ve been spiraling in the “what should I be doing with my life?” loop, ask:
What sparks joy for me right now, even if it’s small?
What feels calming, nourishing, or playful?
What have I always wanted to try but never allowed myself?
What did I love as a child?
When do I feel most like me?
These aren’t questions to figure it all out.
They’re invitations to help you reconnect with yourself.
You don’t have to be one thing to be whole
So many people are waiting to find their “thing” so they can finally feel whole.
But here’s your reminder:
You don’t have to be one thing to be whole.
You don’t need a perfect elevator pitch.
You don’t need a crystal-clear mission statement.
You just need to stay close to what feels real, honest, and alive—right now.
Follow that. Again and again.
The life you build from that place might not fit into a neat label.
But it will feel like yours.
And that’s more than enough.
With love,
Dr. Therese
Let’s Start Reclaiming Joy—Together.
Come hang out. No pressure, no perfection. Just real conversations about what it means to enjoy your life—exactly as it is.
This Space Is for You If:
☀️ You want to slow down—without falling behind.
☀️ You’re tired of feeling like you have to "deserve" joy.
☀️ You’re ready to stop overworking and start actually living.
What You’ll Get Here:
📩 A Wednesday love letter: Personal stories, small-but-mighty mindset shifts, and permission to do less (but feel more).
🤣 Your weekly dopamine boost: The best therapy and mental health memes from the internet to brighten your week.
☕ The kind of conversations that make you exhale—the ones that remind you you’re not alone and help you reclaim joy in the middle of real life.
(It’s like a coffee date with your encouraging friend who happens to be a therapist.)